Building your web
So far, we’ve discussed why referrals benefit everyone, how to find an entry point when you know practically no one in Sweden, and how to present a clear mission they can help you to achieve. Now the real progress begins when you collect all these referrals and begin to build your web.
For this method to work, you need to be willing to put in efficient effort to build momentum and stay organized. Also, pace yourself because this method could take a while to get off the ground – or you could get lucky and hit gold on the first strike.
If you’ve found your entry point person – someone whose job it is to give you as many contacts as possible – then most likely you’ve gotten about 1-3 referrals to start with. For this example, let’s pretend you have received three referral leads.
Act on these leads as soon as possible. This person may have even contacted them to alert them of your incoming message. You also don’t want to lose momentum because with this method, momentum can build very quickly with the more people you contact. Start by first recording these names down in an Excel list (see the Build your Strategy section for more on how to do this). Your list will eventually get so long that you’ll be grateful you have this database to remind you of important information, such as who referred you to who, which company they work for, contact information, and so on.
Contact each of these people via a messaging system, either by email or LinkedIn. It’s rarely the best approach to call someone directly unless you know ahead of time they’re open to receiving calls. There is no need to call and potentially interrupt someone’s busy day when you have a referral because the referral itself will catch their attention and you are highly likely to get a response. Calling unexpectedly is risky business if you don’t know how they’ll receive it, or if they’re unprepared for a conversation vs. a planned meeting where they show up focused on you.
Remember the section in Networking Techniques on how to position yourself? These are the scripts you will need to use when contacting each of your referrals:
Template #1 for Contacting Referrals:
I was referred to contact you by (name of person), she/he said you could offer to advise/assistance on (subject). Would you be willing to share more on this topic?
Template #2 for Shared Contacts on LinkedIn:
I see you work for (name of company) through our shared contact, (name of person). I’d like to apply for a position there and want to first understand the work environment. Would you be willing to share more about the company culture at (name of company)?
It is essential to mention the name of the person who referred you within the first sentence (Template #1), preferably also the first few words, of your message. People receive so many generic messages that begin with “I hope you’re having a great day!” or similar. However, getting straight to the point and establishing credibility right away is usually appreciated by busy people. You will be sure to catch their attention quickly. Also, by mentioning the name of someone they have already met (Template #2) it creates interest because now their response represents their own reputation since you’ve established a shared contact who directly connects you two – similar to creating accountability.
IMPORTANT: If messaging someone via LinkedIn, always include a personalized message, preferably using the above template. It’s estimated that less than 10% of LinkedIn connections include a personalized message. Imagine how effective it is, then, when you include a personalized message AND a credible reference? There is a 95% chance they will accept your connection request and respond to your message.
ere is how a message reaching out to a new connection should look:
Hi Anna, I was recommended to reach out to you by Therese Larsson who mentioned you had your own consultancy within the IT industry. I’m a new IT consultant and was hoping to learn more about your experiences in the industry. Would you be willing to discuss this?
*Begin with their name (because everyone likes to read their name and feel personalized), start with the name of the person who recommended you, state the reason why they were recommended and why they could benefit you, and end with a call-to-action that is also low effort on their part (in this case, having further discussion).
We can play around with this template. Let’s try a version where we are even more alluring yet direct:
Therese Larsson suggested I contact you regarding the IT consulting industry. I’m a new IT consultant myself and looking to expand my network. Would you be open to discussing your experience in the IT industry in Sweden?
*Right away we drop the name of our referral and establish credibility. We mention vaguely that this message is regarding the IT consulting industry, and since this person is also an IT consultant it’s sure to pique their interest – perhaps this message could lead to a job opportunity for them too? They don’t have enough information yet to know. Finally, you mention expanding your network and that is the motive behind messaging them. This gives them just enough information to trust you and wonder if the meeting could be mutually beneficial. You’re highly likely to get a response with this type of message.
Try to move the conversation as quickly as possible from messaging to a meeting, either online or in person. Usually when the person responds showing openness to networking, that is the best moment to suggest “shall we schedule an online meeting, maybe next week?” If this person has enough information about your intention (you need information they are specialized in, you may have a collaboration to offer, etc.) and you have established credibility by mentioning who referred you, there is a high probability they will accept your meeting offer. There is a lower chance of this becoming a meeting if you don’t move it from messages to meetings yourself, meaning make the ask rather than waiting on them to offer.
Once in the meeting, repeat the same steps: asking questions about their background, and at the end of the meeting asking if they can introduce you to anyone else. They are likely to mention 1-3 people. Depending on how quickly you follow up with these leads, you’ll quickly begin to build your own web.
*Insert graph of web*
If names begin to accumulate too quickly (yes – this method is so powerful that you can go from no networking to a network of 20 new people within one month) then keep adding them to your Excel list along with the name of who referred you and on what date. You can methodically work through the list until you reach your desired goal.
MINDSET PREP
Put the odds in your favor
How many new people are you interacting with on a weekly basis? And by interacting, this means having a two-way conversation that can build a connection of some sort. Even if you’re socializing on a regular basis with at least one person a week, how many of these people are by chance and how many are strategically chosen?
Quality of interaction is more efficient than quantity, and especially if you don’t consider yourself the socializing-for-fun type then strategically placed social interactions are especially important.
Despite this, progress can still feel like a slow slog towards your goal if you’re only networking and building connections without any real momentum. Therefore you need to keep two things top of mind when networking with a purpose to get maximum results:
- Be proactive: create your opportunities
- Cast a wide net
Create your opportunities
Matthew Hussey is a communication expert who is world-renowned for his networking advice. These days he applies his interpersonal expertise to dating but it translates quite well when you look at it from the point of view for building authentic connections with others. Here is what he says about creating your own opportunities:
Waiting or Creating
Life is full of people who wait. They wait for the right moment to approach someone, or
wait for someone to approach them first. They wait for someone to show enough
interest that they don’t risk being rejected, they wait to be invited, and they wait to
make a move. They wait to feel confident before taking action. Wait, wait, wait, for
everything.
“Waiters” imagine they are playing it safe, but more often than not, only two
things come to those who wait: the wrong thing or no-thing.
Ask yourself: Right now, at this very moment, am I waiting or am I creating? Am I
taking the positive steps which will give me results?
There’s an added benefit to taking your life into your own hands: when you know
you are doing everything in your power to improve your situation, you can be con-
tent even if the results aren’t immediate. The knowledge that you are moving for-
ward, improving, and developing in a significant way is what makes humans happy.
Wherever you feel you are right now, you still have a choice: you can wait or you
can create.
There is only one way to wait: just do nothing. But there are thousands of ways
to create, so the opportunities are endless.
Casting a wide net
If you want to have a better chance of finding the right connection that may lead to a professional opportunity, you must begin with meeting more people. Not one more, not two more, but a lot more. The more people you meet, the more you increase your chances of finding the right opportunities. This doesn’t just apply to finding a job – you can use this method with apartment searching, dating, making Swedish friends, buying a new car, and so on.
Try to imagine networking like dating: you may meet a lot of people, but you will probably only genuinely connect with a smaller percentage. For example, imagine attending a party where there are two hundred people in the room.
Out of these two hundred people, how many would you feel like genuinely following up with due to a personal connection or enjoying their company? Maybe twenty to fifty? Out of this twenty to fifty, there might be only ten or fifteen to whom you felt enough connection to meet more than one other time, not to mention they feel the same way about you.
From this remaining ten or fifteen, how many would actually have leads that can apply to your unique goals, and how many are actually willing to go out of their way and refer you for something very specific, like a job? Five? How long will it take to find your job via referral if you’re meeting only one new person each week? Anywhere from months to years, and in this scenario, you’re left relying on fate, which is like hoping to get rich playing the lottery.
Sometimes people get lucky and they get the right opportunity right away, and it doesn’t take necessarily two hundred people to find your referral. The point of this example is to see that your odds of finding exactly what you’re looking for increase with the more people you interact with. Several other things happen:
- Momentum builds, and you find new connections effortlessly rather than hunting around for them because so many people are referring you around and it’s compounding.
- Your interpersonal skills improve much more quickly, your communication improves, you become wiser and better adapted to the Swedish culture and therefore begin attracting more Swedish friends, professional opportunities, and general acceptance into the community.
- You attract more than one golden opportunity because the seeds you planted months ago by talking to so many people circle back to you in the future when an opportunity becomes available several months later.
- Your network expands exponentially – now you may have more Swedish people in your social media networks, too. This means if you apply for jobs that you may have mutual connections in contact on LinkedIn instead of being a “nobody” in the Swedish culture. This immediately improves your credibility just by knowing the same person, even with no introduction.Every interaction with another human being is a possible gateway to some new world or experience, which could, in turn, introduce you to amazing opportunities (i.e. the one you’re specifically seeking).
Abundance mindset instead of scarcity mindset
Most of us are operating in a scarcity mindset when looking for a job, clients, or professional opportunities – especially as internationals. And this is totally understandable! Look at this statistic on what international professionals are facing in the Swedish job market:Every interaction with another human being is a possible gateway to some new world or experience, which could, in turn, introduce you to amazing opportunities (i.e. the one you’re specifically seeking).Abundance mindset instead of scarcity mindset
Most of us are operating in a scarcity mindset when looking for a job, clients, or professional opportunities – especially as internationals. And this is totally understandable! Look at this statistic on what international professionals are facing in the Swedish job market:
This isn’t a made-up thing to stress over… we have real challenges to overcome. A scarcity mindset can show up in the form of worrying about visa deadlines, financial stress, a limited number of jobs available for a non-Swedish speaker, and so on. But the truth is that having this mindset (even if there is a lot of validity behind it) only takes up valuable brainpower that could be spent focusing on refining a strategy that solves this problem, so that scarcity need not be a problem to begin with.
Imagine that you could be in the percentage of foreign-born professionals who actually find that golden job opportunity in your field, one where you didn’t need to learn the Swedish language to get a job offer, where your visa is sponsored, where you make enough money to support yourself and your family.
Your chances significantly increase (even if the odds seem against you) when you are making decisions and taking actions out of confidence. Showing up to an interview or networking meeting with feelings of desperation shows, even if you think you’re good at hiding it. This can be sensed with subtle facial expressions, a choice in words (like saying “I want to work for your company” vs. “Your company culture seems like a good fit for what I’m looking for”) or unconscious body language (arms folded, which can signal defensiveness, a need to protect, or unavailability vs. looking more relaxed). You may think you can focus hard and avoid these things if you’re careful, but in reality we are all just flawed humans and our humanness will shine through at some point. The best strategy you can have here is to create a mindset of abundance in the world, and it will come through automatically in your actions. That’s now energy saved that can be spent on more important things.
So, how does networking relate to feeling abundant? When you increase the number of people you network with, you begin to see patterns. You may receive the same compliments over and over around a particular topic – now you know this is a strength. You may receive more than one job offer or referral, which now takes you from no prospects to many to choose from – this is a feeling of abundance.
Even if the networking doesn’t immediately result in a job, it will increase your confidence knowing you’re planting seeds all over the place and eventually, one of them will grow into something worthwhile. It could show up at any moment in time. You could wake up tomorrow with a LinkedIn message of someone asking if you’re interested in a new position that just came up. By planting the seeds, there is always hope that things will suddenly shift as opposed to waiting on a small handful of applications to turn into a job opportunity (remember, you have a 10% chance of being chosen for an interview via online application without a referral. If you only applied for 10 jobs this month… chances are slim).
